For more posts by Lori Wildenberg go to https://loriwildenberg.com/
Kids want things to go their way. Well…I guess we all prefer that!
Sometimes they do a little manipulating to get what they want. They may attempt to divide and conquer, “Dad said I could.” Or the more rebellious teenager may toss out a little power-packed tug of war, “I’m not going if she’s going.” Kids know how to work the system to attempt to gain control.
Our kids, big and small, need to see us, moms and dads, as one unit. If we support our spouse, that puts the brakes on the finagling and maneuvering. That also stops a power struggle between husband and wife. (Good side benefit!)
When the divide and conquer game comes to play at your home say, “You’re with me now. Follow what I say. When your dad (or mom) gets home we’ll discuss this and get back to you.” Respond to the rebel’s emotional blackmail, “Where I go-Mom goes.”
When Tom and I are WE instead of ME things go soooooo much better. The bargaining, arguing, and whining are greatly reduced. It is such a relief!
Kids don’t get to call the shots. What they do need is parents that step up to the plate and stand up for each other.
Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace
and to mutual edification.
By Lori Wildenberg Wife to Tom and Mom of 4. Lori is the Co-founder of 1 Corinthians 13 Parenting.
She is co-author of three parenting books (with Becky Danielson), is a national speaker, contributing writer for many on-line magazines, including Crosswalk and ChristianParenting.org, and parent consultant. Lori’s newest book and 1st solo endeavor Messy Journey: How Grace and Truth Offer the Prodigal a Way Home is available on Amazon or at your favorite on-line or brick and mortar store.
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