Tamara, my first-born daughter, is getting married soon. It’s ripping our family apart. We will never be the same. I’ll put on a happy face though. That’s what she wants.
She’s leaving our home. She will change her name and her mailing address. Soon, when she gets herself ready for work in the morning she won’t be doing that in our home anymore. She will be doing that in her own home. When she comes home from work in the evening, I won’t even know she has arrived. She will be home but not in our home anymore.
Strangers in the night:
I won’t need to ask her if she needs anything at the grocery store. She won’t need anything. She’ll have everything she needs at her new home. When it’s cold in the winter I won’t need to ask her if she has enough blankets on her bed. When it’s hot in the summer I won’t have to check to see if her ceiling fan is working. She will never again tell me she heard funny noises outside of her window and ask me to check to see if the side gate is secure. I won’t have to go out in the middle of the night with a flashlight to check for things and strangers that I know were never there. If she is out late I won’t have to worry if she is safe, because I will know she is with some guy; the same guy who is ripping our family apart.
Supposedly he is going to keep her safe….we’ll see.
I won’t be asked to change the oil in her car anymore. I haven’t been asked to do that for a couple years now. Some other guy does that. This so-called ‘man of her dreams’ changes the oil in her car and is ripping our family apart. He does it with a big smile on his face. It’s almost as though he is happy about ripping our family apart. He comes in to our home, takes our daughter from us and smiles his big smile as though he’s done nothing wrong. Can’t he see what he is doing?
Jeremy–remember that name. He’s the one who came into our home on a white horse; not really but he may as well have; and promised my daughter that he would love her and take care of her and make all of her dreams come true.
Jumping off mountains:
When she was much younger, Tamara used to enjoy scrambling over rocks and big boulders. Big ones or small ones, she would try to climb them all. When we came upon a rock in one of our many family hikes she had to pounce on it and climb to the top. If it was a small rock she would quickly scurry to the top and ease herself up into a standing position. She would turn and give us a big smile, showing her satisfaction in having conquered another mountain.
“I’m taller than you dad!” she would proudly proclaim. “Catch me!” She would shout and then she would already be flying toward me as she yelled. She trusted that I wouldn’t drop her. I never had before. I always told her she could trust me never to drop her. I pray that Jeremy will make and keep that same promise.
She was forever looking for things to climb and jump from. If I was near enough to catch her she would shout and jump with the confidence born of experience. I think she enjoyed the flying as much as the climb. My favorite part was catching her in my arms and feeling her tight grip on me. She would giggle with excitement and was soon ready to climb and jump again. I loved seeing her glowing smile inches from my face when she landed in my arms. She was beautiful then and she is more beautiful now. She loved adventure.
She’s off on another adventure soon. She’s getting married. It’s what she has planned for many years. As a young girl she knew she would get married and be a wife to some Prince Charming.
I never stopped her from fantasizing about that dream coming true. I wanted it for her as much as she wanted it for herself. Her dream of getting married is now ripping our family apart but I couldn’t be happier for her and Jeremy.
He happens to be more than a foot taller than her. She always set her sights on what was taller than her and found a way to climb.
Jeremy is a very good young Christian man. I’m happy that my daughter is marrying him. Tamara has chosen well but Jeremy has chosen better. I think he’s getting the better deal but that’s just one unbiased dad talking.
Why do dads throw their children?
When I was a young father I read a study about why dad’s like to throw their children up in the air and catch them. I can’t remember the conclusion to the study but a couple things I do remember.
- The act of throwing your child up in the air helps to develop the inner ear balance. Throwing our children helps give them balance in life.
- The act of catching your child builds trust and increases the bonding between the father and child. It’s a good thing to catch your children, dads.
- Laughter is good for the soul. That wasn’t in the study, it’s in the bible. My kids and I laughed a lot when I would throw them up in the air.
I have never thrown one of my three daughters up in the air and not caught them.
(Accept when in a pool or at the beach. That was intentional.)
I wanted them to know they could trust me to be there when they fell.
Now I am going to throw my daughter, Tamara, one last time. I won’t catch her this time though. She will let another man catch her.
Don’t drop her, Jeremy. She needs to know you will always be there to catch her when she falls.
A message to fathers:
Fathers, throw your daughters in the air hundreds and thousands of times if you have to. Let them know you will never drop them when they fall.
Tamara, I love you and am so proud of you. Jeremy, get yourself ready to catch!
Heavenly Father, we are so proud of our daughter, Tamara. My wife and I thank you for the pleasure and honor of raising her to be your child and soon to be Jeremy’s wife. We pray you will make them strong together. We pray they will grow to trust you always and to know that you will always catch them when they fall. Catch them Father, every time, and build a strong home for them wherever they live.
In the Mighty Name of Jesus we pray.