We made a pact. A perfectly imperfect pact.
Laura, Lisa, and I (Lori) agreed we would never no never straighten up before a scheduled play date.
When we made our promise, Laura and Lisa each had a one-year-old son, I had a three-year-old girl and and an one-year-old boy. Laura lived across the street and Lisa lived next door to me.
This was the all time most freeing agreement we could of made. Because there was no pressure regarding home presentation.We got together –a lot. We even felt comfortable with impromptu gatherings. The disarray of our homes with littles was A-OKAY. The other homes’ organizational flaws were actually welcome because it kept the burden of tidiness at bay.
There was no pressure to be Pinterest perfect or Facebook flawless. We settled into perfectly imperfect mode.
Over the course of five years, Lisa added another son, Laura’s family increased with twin girls, and I had boosted my number to four by having two more daughters. Our families changed but our pact did not.
Friendships for stay-at-home moms of littles is critical. Feelings of loneliness and discontent is common among young moms. With family ties being stretched across this great nation of ours, we need friends.
Tom and I moved from Minnesota to San Diego when we had two little ones. That meant I needed to quit my teaching job and leave my extended family.
Let me tell you, Southern California feels like a different world to a born and bred Minnesota girl.
Street signs were in Spanish. I speak “Minnesotan”.
The land of 10,000 misquotes was replaced with termite territory.
Tornadoes absent. Earthquakes present.
And…I had my fun-loving neighbors to laugh with me and help me through it.
Laura and Lisa are sisters. They included my family in their family gatherings. They opened their perfectly imperfect homes to me and my gang. And more importantly they shared their lives life with us. I am forever grateful for their love and hospitality.
Relationships are the stuff life is made of. They are places to share celebrations and sadness.
Friendships help us take care of ourselves and our families. We really do get by with a little help from our friends.
So if you are in a place of loneliness and isolation, reach out. Don’t wait. Be proactive in “getting the party started.”
We are created for community.
Two are better than one.
What do you do to encourage new friendships?
Wife to Tom, mom of 4 plus one daughter in-love
Co-founder of 1 Corinthians 13 Parenting, author, and speaker
Lori is currently scheduling for the 2016-17 school year. Contact her for your next event.
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